8 Types Of People You Will Find In A Newspaper Joint

We all know that visiting a newspaper joint is one of the most interesting place to be at times coz of some crazy people and their hilarious persona over there. I have visited so many newspaper joint and here i am today to give you the list of the types of people I've met at the joint, grab your bottle of orijin as you roll with me:

1 The Buyers
These are the categories of people that are there to buy the newspaper and get out of there in peace, the gat no time to argue or exchange words with anybody.

2 The Free-Readers
Without these sets of people in the joint, then the joint is incomplete. Their mission is to come and read for free, at times you can even find them at the joint before the arrival of the vendor, the usually take 70% of the population.

3 The Football Freaks
These sets of people are always easy to recognize, all you need to say is "Up Chelsea!!!", that is their remote control. if you love yourself, don't just badmouth their clubs or else! you know the rest.

4 The Politics Freak
Barcanista, how far na temitemi1 how ur ministry? I'm sure the people in the politics section will understand why I'm hailing them. Their persona in real life is the same as their E-persona.

5 The I Too Know(s)
These are the sets of people i love listening to whenever i visit the joint, talk about football, they will put mouth, talk about politics, they are not left behind, talk about celebrities, dem sabi all of them, you will just be wondering if their brain has been replaced with a transistor radio.

6 The Confused Ones
The main reason why these sets of people are always at the joints is because of the crowd, they will keep on stretching their necks like giraffe just to see what others are looking at. Then they will be like "Uncle, shebi this is the Davido that sang: I dey kill mosquito well well?" And you will be like no be only mosquito you kill, na churcquito

7 The Arguers
These sets of people will never believe or admit that they wrong, what they believe is that all what they are saying is the right one and you can never convince them. They can argue for several hours without getting tired, you will even think their argument will lead to fight but it can never.

8 The Pick-pocketers
Hmmm. . . I hail ooo. . . One of their quotes which i love most is "Dem no be thieves but if dem pass, something go lost" from that quote, you should be able to define them.

Feel free to add urz

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'DABLUE QUOTE'

Think on these things...

1. Being alone does not mean you are lonely, and being lonely does not mean you are alone.

2. Love is not about sex, going on fancy dates, or showing off. It’s about being with a person who makes you happy in a way nobody else can.

3. Anyone can come into your life and say how much they love you. It takes someone really special to stay in your life and show how much they love you.

4. Burn the candles, use the nice sheets, wear the fancy clothes. Don’t save it for a special occasion; today is special.

5. Love and appreciate your parents. We are often so busy growing up, we forget they are also growing old.

6. When you have to start compromising yourself and your morals for the people around you, it’s probably time to change the people around you.

7. Learn to love yourself first, instead of loving the idea of other people loving you.

8. When someone tells you, “You’ve changed,” it might simply be because you’ve stopped living your life their way.

9. Someone else doesn’t have to be wrong for you to be right.

10. Be happy. Be yourself. If others don’t like it, then let them be. Happiness is a choice. Life isn’t about pleasing everybody.

― Please SHARE this!.........DAB

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Top 30 Exciting Destinations Tourism In Nigeria

The most populated country in Africa, Nigeria has become an untapped tourist paradise with long stretches of exotic beaches, lush mountains, well preserved tradition and culture and enchanting tourist attractions.
From the spiritual shines to the ancient cities of the north, from the river deltas to the Yoruba kingdoms, the Ibo’s stunning environments and among many simply pure sceneries; Nigeria leaves every visitor breathing hard with suspense and excitement. We present to you 30 top attractions in Nigeria:

1. The Ibeno Beach

Photo Source: Skyscrapercity.com


A blissful destination for tourists stretched over 245km on a sand bank in Ibeno lies the Ibeno Beach, a little haven for leisure seekers. The roaring waves, spots for sunbathing, unpolluted foliage of the mangrove forest, cool breeze from the water and a lush surrounding give this destination an unimaginable allure for tourists.

Location: Ibeno, Akwa Ibom State

2. Obudu Mountain Resort



Above the sea level on the Oshie Ridge of the famous Sankwala Mountains sits majestically the Obudu Mountain Resort. The temperate climate, breathtaking views, idyllic tranquility and beautiful scenery has made this resort one of the famous tourists’ sites in Nigeria.

Location: Obudu, Cross River State

3. Ngwo Pine Forest



The unique forest dynasty that is found in Ngwo Pine is a huge draw for visitors, romantically set by Mother Nature with sharp twists for adventure seekers, beautifully set pine trees and gently flowing stream for lovers, and the loud splashing of the waters inside the dark cleft inside a cave would blow off one’s imagination.

Location: Ngwo, Enugu State

4. Awhum Waterfall



Awhum boasts of numerous immaculate lakes, waterfall and a monastery. The waterfall forms beautiful scenery where water cascades over its top forming a stream, which has become a religious tourist site. It is close to the Awhum Monastery.

Location: Awhum, Enugu State

5. Arochukwu Long Juju Slave Route

The sacred altar, a six foot gully that takes people to the temple and the waterfall in Arochukwu Long Juju Slave route, beg tourists to explore the shrine of Ibn Ukpabi and the cult momument of Kamula.
Location: Arochukwu, Abia State

6. The Giant Footprint of Ukhuse Oke

Photo Source: Ireporterstv.co


In a sacred grove where prehistory meets the modern, between a village called Ukhuse-oke and Ukhuseosi lies this distinct footprints of a prehistoric giant that are embedded permanently on flat granite rocks.

Location: Owan, Edo State

7. Port Harcourt Tourist Beach



If you are looking for a destination where you can run away from the bustling life of a city; one that is built on an artificial sand beach, Port Harcourt Tourist Beach is where you should be. It is a leisure hub along Kolabi Creek.

Location: Port Harcourt, Rivers State

8. Gashaki-Gumpti National Park

Photo Source: Panoramio


A national park that offers a fascinating insight into life in medieval times in Nigeria is the Gashaki-Gumpti National Park. It is located within the Chappal Wadi, Mountain, Chappal Hendu and the Mountain of Wind. It is Nigeria’s largest and most diverse National Park.

Location: Gashaki-Gumpti, Taraba State

9. Alok Ikom Monoliths



300 carved stones standing upright in circles, facing each others in groups with images and texts inscribed on the monoliths are how you would see Alok Ikom Monoliths (UNESCO World Heritage Site) that are in form of a phallus.

Location: Ikom, Cross River state

10. Isaac Boro Garden Park

Photo Source: Punch.ng


Isaac Boro Garden Park is situated opposite the Mile One Bridge along the Old GRA in Port Harcourt. Today, it has become a tourist location where baseball and softball are played and a center for trade fairs and live entertainment. The tomb of Major Isaac Boro, a soldier killed in the Nigeria Civil War lies here.

11. The Tinapa Free Zone & Resort



The charm of Calabar mingled with the taste of its rich culture gives Tinapa Free Zone & Resort that magnificent scenario that mesmerizes tourists. It has 860,000 sq ft lettable retail space, an entertainment strip that houses a digital cinema, restaurants, a mini amphitheater, casino, and children’s arcade, a Studio Tinapa for Nollywood, a night club and pubs. Visit: Tinapa Free Zone and Resort

Location: Calabar, Cross River State

12. Osun-Osogbo Grove



This is the only tourist destination in Nigeria that has sacred shrines, sanctuaries, sculptures and art works that are created in the honour of the goddess of fertility, Osun. It is a UNESCO World Heritage Site situated along the Oshun River.

Location: Oshogbo, Osun State

13. The Emotan Statue

Located opposite the Oba market in Benin City- Emotan Statue stands majestically, clad in her traditional wrapper and a headgear that is associated with royalty in the Benin Kingdom.

Location: Benin, Edo State

14. The Royal Palace Of Oba Of Benin

The royal palace of the Oba of Benin is a UNESCO listed heritage site, centrally located near the King’s Square. It holds a huge collection of sculptural pieces of a lot of Benin Obas in bronze, ancestral shrines and ivory.

Location: Benin, Edo State

15. Sukur Cultural Landscape


Madageli- is the home of the Sukur cultural landscape is populated with traditional cemeteries and ritual terraced areas. Blessed with lush avifauna and situated on top of the Mandara Mountains. It is a UNESCO World Heritage Site.

Location: Madageli, Adamawa State

16. Queen Amina’s Wall

In the city of Zazzau (Zaria) was built well-fortified walls to protect the ancient city by Queen Amina of Zaria, who is renowned for her wise military exploits and strategies so many years. This wall still stands majestically in the modern city of Zaria.

Location: Zaria, Kaduna State

17. Surame Cultural Landscape



When it comes to the wonders of human creativity, ingenuity and civilization, Surame cultural landscape makes that possible. This is a UNESCO World Heritage Site that has walls made of huge stones and a palace for the village chief; Hidi.

Location: Surame, Sokoto State

18. Oban Hills, Cross River State

Korup National Park of Cameroon shares a border with the Oban Hills. Home to a lot of wildlife and plants; and this is one of the few places on earth you can find the Xavier’s Green Bull the Cassin’s Hawk eagle, Crested Guinea fowl, Bat Hawk and over 400 Chimpanzees lives here.

Location: Oban,Cross River State

19. Oke-Idanre Hill



A visit to the Oke-Idanre Hill gives a tourist access to a lot of spectacular valleys that are interspersed with inselbelgs and high plain about the sea level. It is a UNESCO World Heritage Site that has Omi Aopara; the thunder water, Agbooogun foot print, burial grounds, shrines and the Owa’s palace.

Location: Oke-Idanre, Ondo State

20. Ogbunike Caves, Enugu State



Ogbunike Caves make an idea tourists destination. These caves are closely associated with historical and spiritual significance. There are 317 steps that need to be used to descend down to the caves. It is a UNESCO Heritage Site.

Location: Ogbunike, Anambra State

21. Ancient Kano City Walls



There are much more to the beautiful medieval city of Kano when you see the impressive ancient Kano walls (listed on the UNESCO World Heritage Sites’ tentative list) . This 14km radius earth monument has a spiritual, cultural and historical significance. It is associated with the Emir’s Palace.

Location: Kano, Kano State

22. Coconut Beach

Photo Source: Digest.bellafricana.com


No place tells the story of tourism fused with history like Badagry. It has breathtaking and beautiful ocean views, a perfect place for relaxation. 20 miles before you get to the Republic of Benin lies Coconut beach, and it is surrounded by a lot of coconut trees.

Location: Badagry, Lagos State

23. Bar Beach



If you are looking for a beach without plants or even coconut trees, Lagos Bar Beach should be your destination. Located close to the center of the magnificent Victoria Island and it is open to the public. The cool breeze from the ocean and the ocean side walk can be thrilling. Not forgetting the occasional parties and events that take place here.

Location: Victoria Island, Lagos

24. Millennium Park



The Millennium Park is the largest public park in the capital city of Abuja. It is situated in the Maitama district. Her Majesty Queen Elizabeth II of the United Kingdom was the one who inaugurated the park that has become kids’ paradise and a relaxation haven.

Location: Maitama, Abuja

25. Nana Living History Museum

The magnificent national monument of the Nana Living History Museum is situated in Koko in Warri, a museum that was built by a powerful 19th century business man, Chief Nana Olomu Ebrohimi.

Location: Warri, Delta State

26. The Ancient Nok Settlement


All over the world, the antiquities from the Ancient Nok Settlement are seen in galleries and museums. This little archaeologists’ haven is located in Jaba Local government. It was here that the Terracotta figurine was discovered in the world.

Location: Jaba , Kaduna State

27. New Afrika Shrine



When you feel like getting lost in music from the legendary Fela’s family,the New Afrika Shrine is where you should visit. This is the replacement of the original Shrine that was burnt down. A cover charge of N500 is collected. It is located in Adeleye Street, Ikeja.

Location: Ikeja, Lagos State

28. Abuja Arts And Crafts Village



Abuja Arts and Crafts Village is located at the Central Business District in Abuja , behind the Silverbird Cinema. There are lots of artefacts and handicrafts here for visitors to see and even buy.

Location: Abuja

29. Kainji National Park



Kainji National Park was established in1978 which has 3 distinct sectors, the Borgu Game Reserve, the Zugurma Game Reserve and the Kainji Lake where fishing is prohibited. It is situated in Kwara and Niger State.

Location: Niger State

30. Yankari National Park



In Bauchi State is the 2,244 km2 Yankari National Park; a home to wildlife in the state’s South-Central part. It houses a lot of natural warm water springs and it is the one of West Africa’s eco-destinations.

Location: Bauchi State

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How Many Of You Used This Phones.

How Many Of You Used This Phones.

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See What An Artist Did To These Bananas

Every so often, and Instagram feed comes along that has me going back weeks, looking at all the posts I can muster. When I saw Stephen Brusche's Instagram feed, I knew it would be at least an hour before I came up for air. Though he shares much of his art on his page, he is best known for his banana art, which is, well, exactly what it sounds like. Using ink and what I imagine to be a very sharp knife, Stephen carves shapes out the skin of the banana, taking great care to not damage the structural integrity of the fruit inside. Then, he uses a pen to fill in an illustration with what is left of the peel. His cutouts are precise and his drawing skills are top notch, and the result of his efforts is, well, bananas. These are some examples of Stephen's best work. I squealed when I saw my favorite character from The Wire. Can you find him? 1.The Adam & Eve Bananas 2.The Nativity Bananas 3. The Noah's Ark Bananas (Two-By-Two Of Course) 4.The Cutest Banana

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Hilarious: 20 Types Of People You Meet In Lagos Commercial Buses

1. The Perverts

These ones cannot be placed in a particular age bracket. They span from young to old. You find them mostly in BRT's and Molue's. (Our ever happy standing committee crew)

They are always looking for an avenue to stand behind anything FEmale and "tap current" (in their minds, age is just a number ). Like my padi Albeto2k go talk, "Konji na bastard".

The last one I experienced was on a BRT. I was relaxing when all of a sudden the elderly woman standing beside me shouted at the elderly man standing right behind her "Oga hold dat thing ooo, nor let am touch me again"

2. The Toasters

These group have this particular track by Iyanya ft Don jazzy "Gift", on repeat mode in their head. They are constantly looking for anything in skirt. Their sole mission is to find out what is underneath it. (Orijin101 how far nah? )

Once they are about to board a bus, they scan very well and locate the prettiest chick on the bus, if nah only guys dey dere, dem go just wait for the next available bus.

3. The Religious

These ones have been banned on BRT buses since its inception, so you would find them mostly in the regular 14seater buses, Molue's etc.

The moment the bus is about to move you would suddenly hear a loud shout, enough to give a hypertensive person an instant cardiac arrest.

There are a particular set that never seize to amaze me. You find them on most public transports with a jersey (you know them naa ). I have noticed a couple of times that the date of the program on the "jersey" are past.

4. The Sarewagba's

Literally translated: Run, come collect.

These ones are always advertising their goodies. They wear all sorts of micro mini (The type wey Ronald4lif dey sow for yankee ), leggins, tank tops wey nor be their size and all manner of clothing that exposes something just to lure their preys.

You don't want them sitting in front of you, else they expose the crack of their bum for your viewing pleasure. You don't want them sitting beside you either, else they keep rubbing your shoulder with their massive milk factories.

One more thing if you find one sitting in front with the driver and you love your life come down SHARPALY!!.

5. The Sleeping Crew

These ones ehhnnnn!! Infact they can sleep till rapture. . Once the bus starts moving them don dey sleep. Their sleeping pattern can make you laugh till you pee on yourself.

You don't want to meet or have the chronic types sitting beside you. They nod, snore and drool. The only time they wake up is when they hit their forehead on the metallic surface of the backrest in front of them.

Twaci u sef dey this committee ooo. She slept only to wake up after her bus stop to shout "Ewo!!!!" . You are not alone dear, me sef enrol in this committee today. I slept off few metres to my bus stop only to wake up at the next bus stop. I trek so tey I con dey swear for all my enemies.

6. The Ignoramus

These folks would appear so cool you would hardly notice how clueless they really are. After the bus has covered a few kilometres, you would hear them asking the person beside them; "Bros, Abeg shebi na Ikeja this bus dey go?"

The person would be like "Nooooo!!, na Abule Egba this bus they go ooo". Like Aunty Twaci dem go come shout "Ewooooo!!! Driver stop, stop, stop, make I come down"

Hehehehehe

7. The Yokozuna's

I hope we all haven't forgotten that WWE sumo wrestler? Well except you were born in the era of justin bieber.

These group are majorly the extremely obese market women. Choii!! You don't want to find yourself anywhere close to them. They are partly members of "The Sleeping Crew" and the stench from the sweat trickling down their body can make you nauseous instantly.

These ones would occupy half of the seat leaving the other three passengers to compete for what is left. Their usual slogan is "Make una shift nah".

8. The Aproko's

While these ones are not so ubiquitous, you are sure to encounter them once in a while. Pull out your phone and start typing and their long necks would be right above your shoulders with their bulging eyes fixed on your screen.

They are constantly evading passengers privacy with their long necks as though they are expecting a back alert on your phone.

Mtcheeeeeeeeeeewww!!!

9. The Staff's

We all know them. Our Men in black, but most times in mufti when assuming this role. No need for another epistle here.

10. The Happy Family

Have you ever been in a hurry and waiting patiently for the bus to get full and all of a sudden God answers your prayers, a family of 7 just shows up (Father, Mother and 5 Children).

Your face glows at the thought of the bus taking off soon, only for the family of 7 to occupy just two seats and then say "Aunty abeg make dis my pikin manage for your side".

11. The Beggars

These ones never have enough money to get to their destination. They get into the bus and after a few minutes they tap you and say; "Aunty, please help me add N50 to this money"

If they are not successful at this they form tough face and each time the conductor asks for money, you would hear; "Conductor this place too tight, I nor fit comot my money". Only for them to get to the bus stop and......

Well you know the rest.

12. The Instructors

Mostly women who have no idea what downshift of upshift means nor have any clue as to what the function of the clutch is.

They always seem to be experts at tutoring the driver on how to drive well. You would here things like; "Driver move to the fast lane naa" , "This driver too slow, see as him dey drive like learner"

13. The Story Tellers

Loquacious would be an understatement to describe this folks. When you meet them on a bus, you would assume everyone on the bus is their family member. They are always carefree, cracking jokes and have a repertoire of never ending tales. (Most of which na ZOBO ).

I love meeting them sha, they keep the bus lively especially in traffic.

14. The History Keepers

These ancient keepers tend to be in their 70s and above. They are always ranting about the good old days before independence. They would talk about the colonial era down to this democratic dispensation.

They are the only ones who bought peak milk for 2shillings and witnessed the death of Muritala Muhammed. Infact the most infuriating thing about these folks is that when you talk they are quick to shut you up with statements like; "What do you know?", "Keep quiet my friend", "Listen to me...", etc

15. The Consumers

These folks are astounding individuals. They always seat close to the window of the vehicle. Don't get it twisted, its not really about the breeze.

They are gluttons in disguise, chilling to unleash their monstrous appetite on anything that they come across. They keep buying and swallowing, from gala, to puff puff, chin chin, plantain chips, cake, pop corn, Fan Yogo, kunu, zobo, etc.

They won't stop munching and drinking till they get to their bus stop. These ones can finish 1Million Naira inside a bus.

16. The Thieves

They come in different shapes and sizes, ranging from young to old. Their mission is simple, they sit beside you and your wallet, phone, and any other valuable becomes history.

I had an experience with one sometime ago. He sat beside me for about 10mins and highlighted from the bus, before I could say Jacksparrow1207, all I had left was my charger.

17. The Grammarians

You know them already, the likes of Wole Soyinka, Chinua Achebe, Patrick Obahiagbon, etc. They appear on NL with moniker's such as TheSonOfMark, Borrusia, etc.

They always appear quiet, but if you like yourself and want to live long to see your great grand children, please don't taunt them. Else what would be left of your self-esteem would be worse than a cadaver.

You would hear something like "You must be sardonic, lugubrious, to orchestrate such diabolical plot of pseudoclassic mesmerism".

18. The "Gbagaun" Specialist

They are not hard to find, as a matter of fact you find them on almost every bus. Well each time I encounter them, I pray a simple prayer to God saying; "Lord please seal his lips with spiritual adhesive".

If these folks are not properly managed their gbagaun can deflate all the tyres. If I venture type one of the gbagauns here, NL server would immediately start experiencing issues.

19. The Silent Fart Machines

Very difficult to detect, as usual they are not limited to a particular age group. These folks have been sent through time to make your time on the bus miserable.

They produce these deadly gases at intervals and are the first to raise alarm and cover their nostrils to wade off suspicion.

Make Una Fear God ooooooo!!!!

20. The Customer Service Reps.

You know them already, high heels, flashy dresses, designer bags, heavy make ups, etc. Once they get inside the bus their phones starts ringing.

Most times I think they purposely skip the intro "Welcome to the blah blah Call center...." and get straight to the point in "resolving customer complaints" .

These ladies keep talking for as long as they are seated in the bus comfortably. Every other person murmuring or mumbling at their incessant phone calls can GO AND DIE IN THE LAGOON.

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